Monday, December 22, 2008

Wanted: Wet nurse for Musa

Taka ng kumadre sa
AS any adult, I fear failure on this course on walking just because I get too lazy and tired sometimes. Where do these kids get all their energy? I drink as much milk as they do, what gives?

Tuka ng kumpadre sa
THANKS for mom’s mammary, the milk of maternal kindness is 2.38% protein at birth, tapers down to around 1.2% percent protein in six months. The insane notion that humans need huge amounts of protein—that consequently wears down both liver and kidneys—has prompted infant formula manufacturers and dairy industries to dump tons of killer protein melamine in milk formula with the view to increased protein levels that make the grade in current industry-recommended tests. How stupid!

I’ve been asking around for a wet nanny for our Musa—her mom’s breast has ceased churning out the ichor apt to nurse a growing goddess, well, it’s the work stress and the frenzied humdrum of workaday deadlines she has to slog through… that won’t be healthy lapping for Musa. Or any infant for that matter.

A friend is volunteering her 38-year old aunt who’s nursing a one-year old. I’m asking for an interview to figure out 38-24-36, I mean, the prospective wet nurse’s eating regimen, psychological make-up, stress factors that can impact on lactation and add-on hormones, all that jazz that goes into the minutiae of lactose quality.

Brujo verde y verdadero ang lolong ito ni Musa, talagang lintik sa quality control which entails-- to make a clean breast of it—exploring shapely fleshy knoll and suckling that nursing mom’s ample samples.

Ay, tatlong manikurista na pala ang tahasang nagsabi sa ‘kin, ang ganda raw ng hubog ng mga paa ko… parang sa alpombra o carpets lang daw sanay yumapak… parang hindi kailanman tumuntong sa lupa… kasi nga’y hindi pumipitpit o yumuyurak, buong lamyos at banayad na yumayapos sa pisngi ng lupa ang talampakan ko sa paglalakad. No heavy tread as a gesture of respect to Gaea or Mother Earth whose son Antheus drew strength from such contact with terra firma.

I’ll be off with the missus to riparian parts of Pangasinan. To celebrate some peace and quiet for the year ahead. I’ll be doing some cart wheels on the sand, perform a storm dance or two (which sends me a modest downpour), a few hours of hatha yoga head stand—this has a tendency to revert grey hairs to midnight black so I won’t be doing much, I like the flowering talahib crowning my head—and some chi nei tsang practice on boles of coconut palms.

For humans, body reflexes hit their peak at 39—so we wander and trudge through in a wilderness, going around in circles like the Moses-led nation on the march spent 40 years on before settling down to a hardscrabble tract of real estate. Myelin sheaths in our brains wear out at 40… and we wonder if life really begins by running to stand still (thanks to the Irish band U2 for the idiom) when we get to 40.

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